I'm So Sick I Got Ambulances Pulling Me Over and Shit.
One summer in the late 1990s it was really hot. Any time I walked around my neighborhood and passed a car with the windows down and the sound system up, I could hear Eminem: la bête blanche, the rapping white guy, the infuriator of the right, left, and center. The music was ubiquitous enough that you couldn't help hearing it and in my case, liking it. I was a sucker for his sick humor that sent mucus spraying over whatever was around when I finally got the joke, the agonized howls of the narcissistic young male scorned and humiliated, the cleverly articulated and pervasive rage. Of course I liked all the stuff I knew I wasn't supposed to, and Eminem became one of my dark and secret pleasures. Anyway, if I told people I liked him no one believed me.
I leave it to more learned types to dissect and critique the musical and lyrical content of the Eminem ouvre. I will say that I've never heard anyone else rap about Munchhausen syndrome and don't expect to. On Recovery he muses "why is it when I talk I'm so biased to the 'hos?" He must be working his program.
When I started going to doctors all the time, I developed a compulsive desire to listen to Eminem in my car. I could not even turn the ignition key unless I had a CD cued up, if not Em himself, at least D-12 or Bad Meets Evil. Loud. When my mom was there, I turned the volume down, which didn't stop her from informing me every time she got in the car that he doesn't get along with his mother. (She knows because she's from Detroit.)
I had CDs on the seats, under the seats, and spilling out of the glove compartment. I found that when a thought came into my mind it tended to sound like an Eminem lyric. At work Slim Shady started trying to hijack people's therapy sessions. I had to choke back "Why the fuck do you give a shit anyway?" and force "What do you think makes it so important to you?" out of my mouth.
On a recent Sunday, I went to a restorative yoga class. Afterward I floated back to my car, sat in the driver's seat and realized that I didn't need to hear Eminem. Yoga had freed me from bondage and I put on Arthur Rubenstein and Queens of the Stone Age. I still like Eminem, though. In fact, I'm listening to him right now.
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| Photograph by Wendy Brusick |
posted by The Lurker at
1:36 AM
3 Comments:
You amaze me. I just got your email. Wanted to see what's percolating on mysullenvalentine... wanted to feel your subtext. My fave part: I had to choke back "Why the fuck do you give a shit anyway?" and force "What do you think makes it so important to you?" out of my mouth. I'll call Fri - hope you can/want to talk!! Fuck keyboards.
Friday afternoon I'll be back from chemo.
Catherine Elizabeth Wilson
February 14, 1953 – January 24, 2016
Dr. Catherine Elizabeth Wilson spent her last day as she lived her life, in the company of her loved ones and friends. She passed away peacefully at 6:30 a.m., January 24, from complications associated with cancer. She was 62.
Born in Ypsilanti, Michigan, Cathy was a studious young woman. She envisioned college as a path toward independence, to discover the passions that would guide her life. She attended Oakland University in Rochester, Michigan, and then studied film at Southern Illinois University at Carbondale. After graduating, she started work as a film editor for a Chicago ad agency. She moved to Rogers Park, and lived within two blocks of her first home for the remainder of her life. She loved her neighborhood and the lake shore.
In the early 1980s Cathy became involved with Alternatives Inc., a multicultural youth development agency, a deep connection that lasted throughout her life. She taught ESL and art and participated in a broad range of work with a diverse Southeast Asian staff and youth, including beach trips and other activities so the youth could “be kids.” She joined the Board’s program committee in 2003, continuing in that role until 2015. Cathy served on the Board of Directors from 2009 to 2013, a particularly critical time due to the downturn of the economy. During her service on the Board, Cathy’s many contributions included engaging her extended network of friends to share their expertise and serve on various board committees.
Inspired by her community work, Cathy earned her PsyD in 1990 from The Chicago School of Professional Psychology, to become Dr. Catherine Wilson. She worked for 17 years as staff psychologist at the Cook County Juvenile Court clinic, where she provided psychological evaluations, mainly of juvenile offenders. During her tenure at the court, she organized her co-workers to join the International Brotherhood of Teamsters Local 743 and served as the union steward for the psychologists at Juvenile Court. Cathy viewed her union contributions as one of her greatest achievements in life. In 2007, she retired to devote herself to her private psychotherapy practice.
Cathy enjoyed a wide range of diverse interests and had many talents. She was a deeply connected friend to many, a Mensa member, a Chicago Bears fan, an accomplished swing dancer, a sophisticated devotee of music and film, and a voracious reader. A self-sufficient woman with firm ideas and broad knowledge, her intellect, sharp wit, humor, fiery spirit and infinite humanity will be sorely missed by everyone who knew her.
A celebration of Dr. Catherine Elizabeth Wilson’s life will happen on her birthday, February 14, 2016, in the party room behind the Four Treys Bar, 3333 N. Damen, Chicago. A memorial service will begin at 3 PM, followed by a festive gathering for her loving friends and family to share their memories of this remarkable woman.
Donations in her memory can be made to Alternatives Youth Organization, P.A.W.S. and The American Cancer Society.
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